The Classroom Fables: Red and Mr. Wolfe Read online

Classroom Fables

  Red and Mr. Wolfe

  Jonathon Pehrson

  Copyright 2015 Jonathon Pehrson

  Table of Contents

  Title Page

  Copyright Page

  Red and Mr. Wolfe

  Author Biography

  Jimmy “Red” Harrison was an eleven-year-old boy with the brightest red hair you’ve ever seen. He had a gap in his teeth and freckles covered his face. His mom used to call him her “little baby carrot.” He grew out of that name though, or at least he thought he did. His mom still called him “Carrot” but everyone else just called him Red. And Red was late for school.

  “Mom!” Red yelled down the stairs. No response.

  “Mom!”

  “MOOO-“

  “What have I told you about YELLING in the HOUSE?” Red’s mom yelled from the kitchen. She didn’t yell often but when she did, Red’s insides quivered. He instantly ran down the stairs.

  “Mother Dearest, have you seen my book report? Mrs. G comes back today and I wanted to take it in early to show her how good I did. Even though it was late.” Red’s lips stretched into a giant smile across his face. If his mom caught that part, he all but ensured a long-winded lecture about punctuality. His mother loved to lecture.

  “No I haven’t Carrot, I’m sorry,” she didn’t turn around but could feel the burn of Red’s laser vision on the back of her head. That was his punishment for the late book report. She smiled when he stormed out of the kitchen, knowing she got to him. As Red hurriedly searched the hallway and the staircase, he glanced over to see his dog Ralphy. Ralphy was the oldest of Red’s siblings according to his dad, and the whole family agreed. Ralphy excitedly ran over to Red hoping for a rub down.

  “Not now buddy. I’m looking for my homework…” Red nearly fainted as he bent down to pat Ralphy’s head. Red’s homework (or what was left of it) hung from Ralphy’s teeth, shredded to bits. “No… no way… MOM!”

  “What? What’s the matter? Are you okay? Do you need a doctor?”

  “Look what Ralphy did!”

  “Oh my goodness don’t scare me like that! Huh, you don’t see that happen very often do you? Your dog actually ate your homework. That’s going in the Christmas card!” She slapped her knee and laughed it off.

  “Mom this is serious! What am I going to do?” Red looked at his mom with distress in his eyes, and she stopped laughing and got serious. Mom mode kicked in with a simple look on Red’s face.

  “Well you’re going to leave for school right now,” she said as she hurried to the kitchen with Red on her tail. “You are going to take whatever is left of your homework and put it in your backpack. You are going to give Mrs. G this big red apple,” she held out a large, crimson apple that would stop anyone in his or her tracks. “And you’re going to explain the situation to Mrs. G. That’s what you’re going to do. Now go. You’re better off talking to her without the whole class watching.” Red grabbed the apple, stuffed the shredded book report in his backpack, and darted out the door.

  “Thanks Mom! I owe you one!”

  “Be safe I love you Carrot!” Red pretended not to hear his mom call him that dreaded name and began the sprint to school. He was only two blocks away, but in his head Red made it two hundred blocks. He turned the corner, jumped up the school steps, and quickly slowed to a casual stride toward the big front doors.

  As Red walked into the school, he held the apple tight in his hand. He knew that this apple was his key: once he gave the apple to Mrs. G, he knew he would get the extension on that book report. Now of course it wasn’t his fault; his dog had reallyeaten his homework. Mrs. G didn’t believe him, but he knew that if he could give this apple to her, and get the chance to explain things to her, she would allow him to turn it in late. His mom always knew best. A bright, shiny red apple, as everyone knows, is the key to a teacher’s heart.

  There was one problem though. Mrs. G had been out of school for the last two weeks, and her substitute had assigned the book report. It was a part of Mrs. G’s lesson plan, but the Sub had been there when Red’s report was late. So Red was faced with a dilemma: his word against the Sub’s. He brought the shredded pieces of his report with him, but he had seen his friends purposely tear their papers, but his still had the slobber marks. He knew that it would take some serious convincing, but that’s what the apple was for.

  As Red strolled into the school about an hour early, he was spotted by the substitute that had been filing in for Mrs. G. The substitute’s name was Mr. Wolfe, and he was a very sneaky, slimy kind of person. He had big sharp teeth, accentuated by the gray mustache that sat above his top lip. His ears stuck out like that of a goblin’s: very pointy and almost trying to escape from his head. His thick bifocals magnified his dark grey eyes. As he watched Red walking in to the school, he hardly even noticed the boy. All of his attention went straight to the bright red apple his Red’s grasp. Mr. Wolfe was a fanatic for apples, but because he was just a substitute he never got any surprise apples from students. There had been a couple times when he had almost received one, but the students took one look at him and hurriedly put the apple in their backpacks or desks. He swore to himself he would get that apple. No matter what.

  As soon as Mr. Wolfe saw Red walk in, he sprinted to Mrs. G’s classroom. He threw the door opened and screamed for her.

  “Mrs. G! We’ve got a serious problem!”

  “What?! What is going on, Mr. Wolfe?” Mrs. G dropped her papers and met him in the middle of the room.

  “While you were gone, there was a lice outbreak in your class! Luckily for me, I’m bald,” he said as he compassionately rubbed his wrinkly head. “But you’ve got to go get yourself checked!”

  “But… but… I wear a wig,” Mrs. G pulled her blonde wig off and showed Mr. Wolfe her short grey hair. Mr. Wolfe nearly jumped out of his skin.

  “Whoa! I mean, you better get that little bit of hair checked, Mrs. G!” He rubbed his hands together, seeing that he was getting through to her.

  “Oh… well I guess you’re right. Will you keep an eye on the class for me? We won’t see any kids for another hour but you never know!” Mrs. G unknowingly left her wig on the desk and scampered towards the door.

  “Yes, that’s right, you never know!” Mr. Wolfe led Mrs. G out of the room, ran back to the desk, and put her wig on. After he slid the wig on, he began to search her desk drawers. As he dug, he found an old lipstick, and used his finger to apply the brownish paste. He hurriedly slammed the drawers closed when he heard Red’s whistling. That kid could whistle like nobody’s business, and his favorite place to whistle was the hallway. It had great acoustics.

  As Red approached the door to Mrs. G’s room, he stopped and took a deep breath. He practiced his best smile a few times, and exhaled deeply as he knocked on the door.

  “Come in,” Mr. Wolfe said in his sweetest falsetto, which resembled the sound of an old barn door screeching on it’s old hinges. Red apprehensively poked his head in and put on the voice he used while trying to talk his parents into something.

  “Mrs. G, can I talk to you for a minute?”

  “Of course Red! That’s what I’m here for… please, come in!” Mr. Wolfe’s voice cracked a few times and he coughed very heavily as Red walked toward the desk.

  “Oh wow Mrs. G, I didn’t think you were sick, I thought you went on vacation! You don’t look very well!” Mr. Wolfe gasped in anguish, sincerely taking offense to what Red had said. He quickly snapped back into character, still slightly frustrated.

  “What can I do for you, James?” Red’s face instantly shot straight up; hearing his full name struck fear into his soul. Nobody called him that except f
or his parents when he was in deeeep trouble, or by substitutes. He was instantly suspicious.

  “Wow Mrs. G, you’ve got some seriously big eyes today. You feeling okay?” Red set the apple down on the desk, yet still out of the reach of the fake Mrs. G. Mr. Wolfe’s eyes didn’t leave the apple has he responded.

  “I got these new glasses while I was on vacation,” he said slyly as he licked his brown lips. Red stared him down and watched his every move. He grabbed the apple and slid it across the desk. Mr. Wolfe’s eyes followed it the entire time.

  “Did you grow a moustache while you were gone, Mrs. G?”

  “That’s an awfully rude thing to say, Mr. Harrison!”

  “I’m sorry, I just couldn’t help but notice. It also looks like your ears got bigger. Where exactly did you go?” Red could see the sweat on Mr. Wolfe’s forehead beginning to bead. He knew that this wasn’t Mrs. G, and as Red grabbed the apple Mr. Wolfe jumped across the desk trying to grab it.

  “Give me that apple Red!” the wig flew off and Mr. Wolfe’s true identity was revealed. As soon as he reached for it, Red grabbed it and started circling the desks. Mr. Wolfe leaped after him trying to snatch the apple out of his hands. “Quit running away and just give me the apple!”

  “No! How did you get Mrs. G’s wig?” Mr. Wolfe stopped running for a moment and stared at Red, puzzled.

  “You know she wears a wig?”

  “Yeah, of course I do. The whole class knows. It fell off during kickball on our first free day we earned this year. Sometimes she teaches without it on, it’s really funny.”

  “Hmm. I had no idea. You should have seen how I jumped when I first –“ he stopped mid-sentence and leaped at the apple. He caught Red off guard with his questioning and thought he could outsmart him. Red was much quicker though, and had already zigged and zagged his way to the other side of the classroom.

  “Nice try old man! This apple isn’t for you; it’s for Mrs. G! Maybe if you weren’t such a mean old grump you’d get one of these every now and then!”

  “I’m not grumpy, kids these days have no respect for their elders! If I get that apple it will show everyone that I deserve a permanent teaching job!” As Mr. Wolfe was explaining his plot to Red, Mrs. G had just finished her lice check and was walking back to her room when she heard the two arguing. She hollered at them and she burst into the room.

  “What in the blue blazes is going on in here?” Mr. Wolfe froze as soon as he heard the door open, and he knew that he was in trouble.

  “Mrs. G! Thank goodness! Mr. Wolfe dressed up like you and tried to steal this apple I brought you!” As Red ran to Mrs. G’s side, Mr. Wolfe ran around the back of the desks towards the door.

  “Hold it right there, Mr. Wolfe,” Mrs. G had a very commanding voice, though she never liked to use it. She had scared a few children throughout her teaching career. “I can’t believe you would try and trick my student! I expect to see you in the principal’s office right after I finish speaking with Red.”

  “Yes ma’am, Mrs. G. I just wanted to gain a little respect from my peers.”

  “Well dishonesty isn’t the way to do it,” Mrs. G watched Mr. Wolfe walk down the hall toward the principal’s office, then shut the door behind her. “Now, please tell me why you have decided to show up so early today Red.”

  “Well you see, I wanted to talk to you about the book report that was due yesterday. I wanted to talk to you before Mr. Wolfe did, because he didn’t like me and I knew he would tell you the whole story. I couldn’t find my homework this morning, and long story short my dog ate it. I brought what is left of it to show you,” Red reached into his backpack and put the shredded pieces on Mrs. G’s desk.

  “Oh dear, what a mess!” Mrs. G tried to sort through the shredded pieces of paper but the dog slobber encouraged her to just throw it away.

  “And so I wanted to bring you this apple and ask if I could redo my report and turn it in tomorrow?” Red flashed his biggest smile and stared at Mrs. G.

  “Well how could I say no to an apple that looks that delicious? Of course you can turn your report in tomorrow.”

  “Thanks Mrs. G! I’ll start on it right now,” Red ran to his desk and began re-writing his book report, trying to sort through what Mrs. G didn’t throw away. “A mom always knows,” Red thought to himself.

  ###

  Author Biography

  Jonathon Pehrson was born and raised in Idaho Falls, Idaho and is attending Full Sail University attaining his Bachelors Degree in Creative Writing for Entertainment. This is the first story of his fairy tale anthology Classroom Fables, which he plans on releasing this year.